01 Austria
B: Good lyrics for song #1. I like the recognition that “Machen die Leit Musik / Oft wird’s verkauft als des, was gar net is”.
A: Rather boisterous opening to the contest. Ms Mendt tries to match this vocally in the chorus (in which the Viennese Austrian German sounds remarkably Slavic) but doesn’t manage it with a lot of conviction. Quite an odd choice of melody for the chorus as well, like they deliberately tried to eschew anything you could sing along to. This goes with the line “Soll’s die Sprach der Phantasie und Freiheit sein”, but fails to help its chances much. Consistent though, and the arrangement is good, particularly in the bridge.
V: Forehead-forward Marianne’s delivery in the verses is almost the vocal equivalent of a shrug of the shoulders, and as I suspected is overshadowed in the chorus by the wall of noise coming from the orchestra pit. The beautifully rolled Rs earn her extra points.
02 Malta
B: Lines like “Il fortuna laqqgħatni miegħek / Ħelu d-destin” have a very stop-start look about them, don’t they. The name Twanny is brilliant, but it must have left the poor conductor open to a lot of ribbing.
A: The studio version I have sounds way too crisp to be the original. Certainly sounds tacky enough to be associated with Malta though; you still hear this kind of show tune in badly lit, sparsely populated lounges on Finnish ferries. The Maltese sounds much nicer than it at times looks on paper, but can’t do much to mask the very cheap production.
V: Joe Grech sings out of the side of his mouth as though his jaws aren’t aligned. He gives it what-for when the music ramps up, but that’s about the only thing that adds any excitement to the song. The ending certainly doesn’t.
03 Monaco
B: The lines “Mais si nous ne partageons rien / Que nous reste-t-il en commun?” and the last verse generally are as topical today as they ever were.
A: This just has everything going for it from the outset, which isn’t something that can be said terribly often about Monaco. It was composed by the same fellow as Celui qui reste... and you can tell: it has the same insistent rhythm, but a better melody. Plus the otherwise-might-have-been-irritating aspects like the la-la-la backing (and ending) and the slightly overbaked sentimentality work. Even the harp feels right.
V: Bit of a cacophony this year, isn’t it. Not that it can hide how effective both the composition and arrangement are here. The vocals do sound a bit shredded at times, however.
04 Switzerland
B: Youth was clearly a running theme in French-language pop in 1971.
A: This is nicely arranged and has some good harmonies. Seems like it’s missing something at first, but this feels right enough by the end, given its brevity. Harmless and, well, nice.
V: The way Peter’s holding his guitar is very awkward, Marc’s hair looks like a helmet and the la-la opening befuddles me: it’s like they’ve forgotten the words (not to mention the music) and are just going to stand there for a couple of minutes singing bugger all. Things fall into place once the song actually starts, but not all that engrossingly.
B: Youth was clearly a running theme in French-language pop in 1971.
A: This is nicely arranged and has some good harmonies. Seems like it’s missing something at first, but this feels right enough by the end, given its brevity. Harmless and, well, nice.
V: The way Peter’s holding his guitar is very awkward, Marc’s hair looks like a helmet and the la-la opening befuddles me: it’s like they’ve forgotten the words (not to mention the music) and are just going to stand there for a couple of minutes singing bugger all. Things fall into place once the song actually starts, but not all that engrossingly.
05 Germany
B: In its way this is just as sentimental as Monaco, but with a different focus – which is laudable in itself, and ahead of its time I would have thought, but current affairs and pop never go together for me very successfully. I like the lines “...ist sie auch ein Staubkorn nur in der Unendlichkeit / ...dieser Stern ist unser Stern...”.
A: More harps, and another perfectly good arrangement, if a little uninvolving in the verses.
V: Katja here reminds me of one-time Russian Eurovision wannabe Anastasia Stotskaya. Fab hair and outfit. Best performance overall so far, too, with some great backing vocals.
06 Spain
B: “Busca las cosas sencillas y encontrarás la verdad” seems a bit naïve, but I like the idea.
A: I like the way this builds, too. I was about to decry its lack of a clear chorus, but it works anyway. Didn’t hook me immediately, and – oh... that Big Band marching end that’s tacked on. Oh dear. And it was doing so well for itself!
V: In another case of Russian doubles, Karina looks just like primadonna Lyudmilla Gurchenko before her eyes sealed over from a lifetime of plastic surgery. This makes loads of Eurovision sense, so I understand why it did so well for itself. I’m not sold on it, but Karina gives a good performance. I wonder if she knows she has a hole in her dress.
07 France
B: “Semer en étant sûr que l’on donne la vie / De la graine au bourgeon et de la fleur au fruit” is another prime example of this language taking eye-rolling lyrics and making them somehow enormously palatable.
A: Listen to the oh-so-French voice on Serge Lama! This is terribly well-composed, in the verses at least, which try for something a bit different. The chorus is a bit run-of-the-mill*. In fact it seems to take all the power out of it when it should really be injecting it. Nice ending.
V: *It’s only just struck me, in fact, how much it sounds like The First Noël. I wonder who the rather glamorous young lady watching Serge from the wings is. What a mystery. Serge himself looks like he’s been busting to go to the loo for ages but is holding it in.
08 Luxembourg
B: She claims “Je voudrais savoir ce qu’il y a dedans” but she’s already answered her own question: “il y a des tas de pépins”! Tant pis.
A: I love the crackle on the 45 recording I have. This is very boppy. It sounds a bit like Jack in the Box, which is unfortunate for it, considering it’s next. Supremely brainless, but not nearly as dire as I expected it to be. Indeed, there are some lovely touches to the composition.
V: Monique looks like a Blue Peter presenter. Luxembourg were a bit mean, weren’t they, only sending one backing vocalist as accompaniment. They get away with it, but the whole thing feels threadbare – albeit in a guileless sort of way.
09 United Kingdom
B: Clever metaphor here. The lines “...when it’s upside down / Look at the way that it swings” are tittersome.
A: This is yet another super-solid production from the UK. How can you not love it? As with Monaco, the la-las feel right rather than annoying.
V: Hotpants! Clodagh Rodgers’ cleavage appears to have migrated to her shoulders from some angles, and she looks like she has Monty Python animated eyes – which is quite appropriate, given that’s where I best know and remember this song from – like some Frankenstein prototype of Olivia Newton-John. Despite the movement that goes into this, it still comes across as way too static; almost half-hearted.
10 Belgium
B: The whole “...krijgen we niet al te veel, ’t kan ons niet schelen / We vinden ook het minste deel sensationeel” thing makes me suspect that morgen is a metaphor for something rather base and depraved. Hopefully.
A: How I bet Nicole & Hugo wish they’d been able to stick with this. It doesn’t do much that’s spectacular, but what it does do it does pretty well, and Jacques and Lili sound great together.
V: Jacques is much more of a looker here than he was in 1963, but he can’t dance to save his life. Lili looks like Stefanie Powers, but has the wobbly voice of a woman twice her age. Together they look like they’re enjoying themselves, but it all seems a bit perfunctory.
11 Italy
B: The line “Chissà se un fiore c’è là sotto la neve per te” comes across a bit aggressively, given its beauty.
A: What a tremendous vocal arrangement. I would like Massimo Ranieri’s delivery to be a little more toned down here and there, but this could be seen as staying true to the emotion driving it all. Sounds like the kind of song that would have persuaded Greece to enter a few years later, what with all the balalayka things.
V: Massimo looks like he should be starring in a BBC adaptation of something by Dickens, not singing in Eurovision, but he’s one of the few performers in this contest with a voice big and bold enough to outdo the orchestra.
07 France
B: “Semer en étant sûr que l’on donne la vie / De la graine au bourgeon et de la fleur au fruit” is another prime example of this language taking eye-rolling lyrics and making them somehow enormously palatable.
A: Listen to the oh-so-French voice on Serge Lama! This is terribly well-composed, in the verses at least, which try for something a bit different. The chorus is a bit run-of-the-mill*. In fact it seems to take all the power out of it when it should really be injecting it. Nice ending.
V: *It’s only just struck me, in fact, how much it sounds like The First Noël. I wonder who the rather glamorous young lady watching Serge from the wings is. What a mystery. Serge himself looks like he’s been busting to go to the loo for ages but is holding it in.
08 Luxembourg
B: She claims “Je voudrais savoir ce qu’il y a dedans” but she’s already answered her own question: “il y a des tas de pépins”! Tant pis.
A: I love the crackle on the 45 recording I have. This is very boppy. It sounds a bit like Jack in the Box, which is unfortunate for it, considering it’s next. Supremely brainless, but not nearly as dire as I expected it to be. Indeed, there are some lovely touches to the composition.
V: Monique looks like a Blue Peter presenter. Luxembourg were a bit mean, weren’t they, only sending one backing vocalist as accompaniment. They get away with it, but the whole thing feels threadbare – albeit in a guileless sort of way.
09 United Kingdom
B: Clever metaphor here. The lines “...when it’s upside down / Look at the way that it swings” are tittersome.
A: This is yet another super-solid production from the UK. How can you not love it? As with Monaco, the la-las feel right rather than annoying.
V: Hotpants! Clodagh Rodgers’ cleavage appears to have migrated to her shoulders from some angles, and she looks like she has Monty Python animated eyes – which is quite appropriate, given that’s where I best know and remember this song from – like some Frankenstein prototype of Olivia Newton-John. Despite the movement that goes into this, it still comes across as way too static; almost half-hearted.
10 Belgium
B: The whole “...krijgen we niet al te veel, ’t kan ons niet schelen / We vinden ook het minste deel sensationeel” thing makes me suspect that morgen is a metaphor for something rather base and depraved. Hopefully.
A: How I bet Nicole & Hugo wish they’d been able to stick with this. It doesn’t do much that’s spectacular, but what it does do it does pretty well, and Jacques and Lili sound great together.
V: Jacques is much more of a looker here than he was in 1963, but he can’t dance to save his life. Lili looks like Stefanie Powers, but has the wobbly voice of a woman twice her age. Together they look like they’re enjoying themselves, but it all seems a bit perfunctory.
11 Italy
B: The line “Chissà se un fiore c’è là sotto la neve per te” comes across a bit aggressively, given its beauty.
A: What a tremendous vocal arrangement. I would like Massimo Ranieri’s delivery to be a little more toned down here and there, but this could be seen as staying true to the emotion driving it all. Sounds like the kind of song that would have persuaded Greece to enter a few years later, what with all the balalayka things.
V: Massimo looks like he should be starring in a BBC adaptation of something by Dickens, not singing in Eurovision, but he’s one of the few performers in this contest with a voice big and bold enough to outdo the orchestra.
12 Sweden
B: I absolutely love these lyrics: Europe’s not just all sun-soaked Mediterranean. I’d love to see a British version of it: Grey Expanses?
A: More balalayka-sounding thingies! The chorus is so easy to sing along to. This seems like a concession forced on the rest of the song, which is much more principled. Still, it’s not trotted out all that often.
V: Marie Bergman looks like Shirley Jones doing The Partridge Family. I see Family Four would return in ’72 with much less success, but I almost chucked a point their way then, and I may yet do so here. Great harmonies. Pierre, on the left, doesn’t move his legs much; perhaps his trousers are so tight they’ve cut off the circulation.
13 Ireland
B: For the lines “One day soon, very soon / Deep in love you will fall” I say: thank you, Yoda.
A: I like the acoustics and brass introduced in the third verse in place of the temporarily retired strings; it would all be a bit repetitive otherwise. Still feels like it goes on for six minutes rather than three though, and as home entries go it’s very bland.
V: Angela Farrell looks rather dour, despite her pink frock. She has a slightly irksome voice which doesn’t really suit the song, too. But her diction is to be commended.
V: Marie Bergman looks like Shirley Jones doing The Partridge Family. I see Family Four would return in ’72 with much less success, but I almost chucked a point their way then, and I may yet do so here. Great harmonies. Pierre, on the left, doesn’t move his legs much; perhaps his trousers are so tight they’ve cut off the circulation.
13 Ireland
B: For the lines “One day soon, very soon / Deep in love you will fall” I say: thank you, Yoda.
A: I like the acoustics and brass introduced in the third verse in place of the temporarily retired strings; it would all be a bit repetitive otherwise. Still feels like it goes on for six minutes rather than three though, and as home entries go it’s very bland.
V: Angela Farrell looks rather dour, despite her pink frock. She has a slightly irksome voice which doesn’t really suit the song, too. But her diction is to be commended.
14 The Netherlands
B: Love the lines “...stormen worden opgebouwd / Uit adem, zucht voor zucht”.
A: That’s a cor anglais, isn’t it? All the woodwind here is lovely. In fact the entire arrangement is impressive; there’s something almost medieval about it, and you really get the sense of a story being told. You know, a proper one. This does tend to make it feel like there should be 30 more minutes of music either side of it telling the rest of the story; as an independent piece of music it doesn’t really work. Good though. I like the fact it’s called Time but feels so timeless, like it pays no heed to it.
V: Saskia’s rather stunning, as is her voice. I think I’m getting the awkward guitar thing now: they have to hold them up to the microphone so that anyone will actually hear them, yes?
15 Portugal
B: Hay... mint... pine tree sap... lavender without a flower bed... It must be poetry: I have no idea what most of it means. It sounds largely like a religious experience, and given that the performer, composer and lyricist have the names Jesus, Nazareth and the Saints among them, this might not be a coincidence.
A: So creative, without sounding odd, and still sounding contemporary. Love it.
V: Great dress. Great ending. Great everything.
16 Yugoslavia
B: It’s nice to see lines like “A noć je duga i tamna kao bol” being trotted out in a Balkan entry in a context other than civil war.
A: The chorus here needs to be stronger, but there’s no denying how captivating the arrangement is – there’s always something vying for your attention, or stealing it away unexpectedly. Having said that, it starts to get a bit samey after two minutes.
V: This sounds more High Ridge than Portugal, and Kruno certainly sounds more like Tom Jones than Joe Grech looked the part of his swarthy Maltese uncle. I’d be more upset with his hairdresser and stylist than his ex-girlfriend if I was him though. Fantastic vocals (and eye shadow).
17 Finland
B: The idea that “Kun yksi ottaa ja toinen antaa / ... / ...samaa tietä kuljetaan” is reminiscent of Monaco.
A: This has the same kind of drive as Jack in the Box, but it’s stuck in a much lower gear. It feels a bit too disjointed, like the composers had written parts for three different songs and just ended up cobbling them together (as I did with the lyrics above). Mind you, they also wrote Tom Tom Tom, so maybe it was deliberate. It could be a work of genius; but I suspect not.
V: This is typical enough of the contest to explain why it did so well by Finnish standards. Markku Aro looks like he could be one of David Walliams’ characters from Little Britain.
18 Norway
B: Thematically this isn’t that different from Spain, but they certainly express it in a different way – “Lykken er sild i dill” indeed!
A: Surprisingly, given it’s only 1971, this is the only song that still sounds ’60s. (A year out clearly didn’t help their sense of timing.) Perhaps it’s because Arne Bendiksen’s behind it. It was up against a lot of stuff that must have sounded much more ‘with it’, so I assume it came across as staged as it sounds. Looks like it was.
V: [Was it?] Yes, and how. If I’d been in the audience those false endings would have gotten on my tits.
And so to the points…
1 point goes to Austria
2 points go to Germany
3 points go to Yugoslavia
4 points go to Spain
5 points go to Sweden
6 points go to the Netherlands
7 points go to the United Kingdom
8 points go to Monaco
10 points go to Italy
and finally...
12 points go to...
Portugal!
The wooden spoon is awarded, on its debut or not, to Malta.
B: Hay... mint... pine tree sap... lavender without a flower bed... It must be poetry: I have no idea what most of it means. It sounds largely like a religious experience, and given that the performer, composer and lyricist have the names Jesus, Nazareth and the Saints among them, this might not be a coincidence.
A: So creative, without sounding odd, and still sounding contemporary. Love it.
V: Great dress. Great ending. Great everything.
16 Yugoslavia
B: It’s nice to see lines like “A noć je duga i tamna kao bol” being trotted out in a Balkan entry in a context other than civil war.
A: The chorus here needs to be stronger, but there’s no denying how captivating the arrangement is – there’s always something vying for your attention, or stealing it away unexpectedly. Having said that, it starts to get a bit samey after two minutes.
V: This sounds more High Ridge than Portugal, and Kruno certainly sounds more like Tom Jones than Joe Grech looked the part of his swarthy Maltese uncle. I’d be more upset with his hairdresser and stylist than his ex-girlfriend if I was him though. Fantastic vocals (and eye shadow).
17 Finland
B: The idea that “Kun yksi ottaa ja toinen antaa / ... / ...samaa tietä kuljetaan” is reminiscent of Monaco.
A: This has the same kind of drive as Jack in the Box, but it’s stuck in a much lower gear. It feels a bit too disjointed, like the composers had written parts for three different songs and just ended up cobbling them together (as I did with the lyrics above). Mind you, they also wrote Tom Tom Tom, so maybe it was deliberate. It could be a work of genius; but I suspect not.
V: This is typical enough of the contest to explain why it did so well by Finnish standards. Markku Aro looks like he could be one of David Walliams’ characters from Little Britain.
18 Norway
B: Thematically this isn’t that different from Spain, but they certainly express it in a different way – “Lykken er sild i dill” indeed!
A: Surprisingly, given it’s only 1971, this is the only song that still sounds ’60s. (A year out clearly didn’t help their sense of timing.) Perhaps it’s because Arne Bendiksen’s behind it. It was up against a lot of stuff that must have sounded much more ‘with it’, so I assume it came across as staged as it sounds. Looks like it was.
V: [Was it?] Yes, and how. If I’d been in the audience those false endings would have gotten on my tits.
And so to the points…
1 point goes to Austria
2 points go to Germany
3 points go to Yugoslavia
4 points go to Spain
5 points go to Sweden
6 points go to the Netherlands
7 points go to the United Kingdom
8 points go to Monaco
10 points go to Italy
and finally...
12 points go to...
Portugal!
The wooden spoon is awarded, on its debut or not, to Malta.
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